In Christopher Titus’ stand-up “Love is Evol,” he talks about relationships and “first date weight,” asking audience members to be honest with themselves – are they within five percent of their first date weight? This really got me thinking…
About five months ago, I got into a new relationship with a wonderful man who loves me more than I ever thought possible. He tells me regularly that he thinks I’m beautiful and makes me feel good about myself on the inside and out.
He also takes a great deal of joy in cooking for me. So between the happiness, the consistent reassurance that he finds me attractive, and the abundance of delicious food, I’ve tacked on the “relationship weight.” And it happened very quickly.
To sum it up: I’m not within five percent of my first date weight.
It started off subtle. My work pants fit too tightly. My kickboxing workouts have become increasingly difficult. I’m tired more and more of the time.
My boyfriend has noticed my unhappiness with the weight gain and how I feel about it, and has been supportive of my need and want to get my weight back under control. He has offered to help. (I told him one of the first things he can do to help is not to encourage seconds – this is tough for both of us because his food is delicious and he takes a lot of pride in cooking for me.)
I’ve always believed in living a healthy lifestyle that you can maintain rather than dieting. When I entered into this relationship, my lifestyle habits changed. So moving forward, it’s about once again finding that balance in my life so that I can lose the relationship weight, and get back to within five percent of that first date weight.
It’s not about being skinny. It’s about being strong, fit, and healthy in every aspect of my life, including my relationship.