It’s Monday, and in reflecting on how the past few days have gone, I’ve realized a few new things about myself:
- Helping people I love is more important to me than my personal goals.
- I make a lot of excuses.
- I have no willpower.
Maybe this is me being a little hard on myself, but I don’t want to get used to kid gloves.
Thursday last week, Boyfriend and I went to his grandpa’s funeral. He and his grandpa were very close, and it was important to me to be there for him. Which, to me, meant going home afterward and drinking with him. Excess is an understatement, but I was trying to be supportive.
The next day, I felt like crap (obviously). So I didn’t work out, and I didn’t eat well.
And the weekend, well, by then I had lost my enthusiasm and my give-a-shit-ometer was a wee bit broken. It didn’t help that earlier I had seen a large weight fluctuation overnight that really discouraged me. Four pounds in a day is a lot to accept when, in reality, I hadn’t overdone it enough to deserve that.
Anyway, when I really look back on the last week or so, it comes down to willpower and understanding that being supportive doesn’t mean have to do what others are doing. Just because Boyfriend was drinking, didn’t mean I had to join him. If I hadn’t, I think the days that followed would’ve looked much different.
What this all comes down to, is that I think I would ultimately benefit from setting personal, weekly SMART goals:
SMART goals are common in the kind of work that I do, so it’s a concept I’m pretty comfortable with. For those who aren’t familiar, with this type of goal-setting, this site might help >
So, starting today, I’ll set a new weekly SMART goal – maybe every other week, depending on the timeliness of the goal. My goal this week is exercising and improving my willpower. So here’s what I’m going to do:
- Cut back. Portion sizes have slowly been expanding, so it’s time to get them back under control and be honest about how much I’m putting on my plate.
- Find reasonable alternatives. Boyfriend will probably have a drink after work today. I will have water (which is fine for me, because ice water is one of my favorites).
- Keep busy. When I don’t have enough to do, I want to eat. Not helpful. I have big goals I’m working toward, and focusing on those rather than what I want to eat is more important to me.
- Don’t over think it. This will be tough for me… This week’s practice will be think it, acknowledge the thought, and let it go. (As Boyfriend can attest, I over think pretty much everything.)
- Track success. For every time I successfully exercise my willpower, I’ll make a note. For every time I cave, I’ll make a note.
- Reward myself. A week from now, I’ll look back at my tracking, and if my willpower success exceeds my failures, I’ll reward myself – new workout pants or music. If my failures win out, I’ll remind myself what I’m working for and try again.
I’m frustrated with myself for undoing weeks of progress in just a few days, but that’s no reason to give up. It’s a new week, and I have a specific goal I can focus on this week. Onward!